"That Isn't Good Enough, God."

The last few days have been rather hard. Several things have hit me at the same time. Physical, family, the weather getting colder....things that have made me start feeling sorry for myself. Again. One day this week, I had a phone conversation with someone in my family. Someone that I have been very close to but because of something that happened in the relationship over a year ago, it has been broken to a great degree. Because of what happened, I have really grieved for things to once again go back to what it had been. Or maybe a better word to say, it needs to be "healed." Made even better than before Once we had hung up, I said to God, " That isn't good enough." The kind of relationship I have with that part of the family is not good enough. 

Yesterday, I had to go get my bloodwork done for an upcoming doctor appointment. Here it is, almost time to go see the doctor to  get the results about some x-rays that he had sent me for, and if they turn out the way he thought they might, he may want me to go through other tests that may result in me having to need surgery. 

While in the waiting room, I opened a women's magazine and started flipping through it. And I came across an article about a woman that had started out one day having a bad day. She had been running late for work and her morning had been stressful in her efforts to get to her job. Until she got there and stepped on the elevator where a man had told her to cheer up. Things were not so bad. And she realized that, no they weren't as bad as they could be.

And it hit me then. That in my own life, things are not as bad as they could be. In fact, they aren't even as bad as things have been earlier in my life. 

Maybe things aren't the way I want them to be. Especially with that family relationship that I would like God to magically heal. Maybe these medical problems, which incidentally are second only to the family problems, are a real pain in my body and maybe the doctor will want me to go for additional tests. But, things have gotten better just in the last two or three months, in other areas. Maybe it has been rather chilly in this part of the country for the past few days, but today...well this afternoon, the sun had come out and warmed things up enough to remember that the cold weather doesn't last forever. The sun does shine and warm temperators do come back. 

And God does sit on his throne as always. Ok, maybe I have tried in my own way to make him slip off it by complaining, "God, that isn't good enough." But, the fact is, no matter how I feel, or what I think, I am not going to make God slip off his throne. He is always going to be there, and he is always going to do what is best, not only for me but for those family members as well. Whether I like what he does or doesn't do. Whether I like it or not. Because he knows the bigger picture. And I know that without a doubt, he is working on it. 

 

I have to wonder what people do that do not have God to depend on. Those that don't acknowledge him or want him to be in their lives. I cannot fathom it. Because, even in those times when I start to feel sorry for myself and he has to remind me that things aren't as bad as they could be, I know he is there and he grieves with me in times I am sad, and he rejoices with me in things that makes me glad. 

What is "not good enough" for now, won't last forever. I have to have faith that it will at some point get better. That healing will come to a broken relationship. And what little I have now, is certainly better than nothing at all. I know there are a lot of people today-even those that depend on God, that have much less than that small amount that I have, and so I am grateful that he has allowed me that much. Because putting my situation next to theirs, it is a lot. 

The bible says to give thanks for all things because this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning us. 1 Thessalonians 5:18.

Are broken relationships God's will? They aren't his perfect will. He wants us to have a good relationship with our loved ones. However, when it is broken, something needs to be fixed. And his will is to fix it so that it can be whole. So he allows us on both sides to go through some painful times to get us to that point. 

And so, the next time you get to feeling sorry for yourself, remember that God is waiting for you to remember that he loves you and he does have your situation under his control if you will let him. After all, he knows what is best and what it will take for what you to get from point A to point Z. It is just a matter of time. His time. 

Thanks for coming today friends. As always, I love sharing God with you. Have a blessed day!